Thursday, March 16, 2017

The time I ran the greatest race in the history of all the races.

So the BRPE and I went to Disney World to run the race of all races - the Disney Marathon. Lemmetellya, it's the best race I've ever run. Hands. Down.
If you ever want to run a marathon that doesn't really feel like a marathon, then this is the race for you. Because, Disney.
 It was so fun that my psycho-face was in full force. I couldn't help myself.
 I'm the only person in the world that can run a marathon and still have three chins. I give up.
 Imagine all the fireworks, all the Disney parks, all the characters, all the music, all the people cheering - all the stuff that makes Disney amazing all rolled into one race and then multiply that by 100, and that's how much fun this was.
Also, we killed it. No one crashed. No one (me) cussed up a blue streak. No one puked. No one cried. No one fell over in utter exhaustion. It was the race of all races.
I've compared running a marathon to labor and delivery. This was the scheduled-c-section-right-before-you-get-to-the-miserable-point-of-pregnancy-but-right-after-anything-dangerous-could-happen-to-the-baby kind of thing. So, basically, perfect.

Thursday, March 9, 2017

If there was ever any hope of my daughter supporting me financially someday, it went out the window this year.

Because this girl is KILLING IT in the theater. She went from Dorothy in Wizard of Oz right to Amaryllis in Music Man (and next is Jasmine in Aladdin). She's on fire, ya'll. And we all know that what follows will be years of being cast as Tree #3, but for now she's eating. This. Up. 
All this theater experience has served to confirm that all she wants to do someday is own her own community theater. Translation: No health insurance or 401k for this girl!
 She's said this for years and I've always countered with, "That will be an awesome hobby for you someday."
 But she's no longer buying it. The other day she said, "Mom, you know I don't care about money don't you?" And I do know that. And it's honorable and stuff. But geeesh, woman, I don't want to support you one day longer than I have to. 
 The best thing about this whole theater obsession is that she is now using this passion to work with special needs children. She auditioned to be a mentor for a full-stage production of Aladdin at Special Care. All the leads are played by special needs children. She is mentoring the girl who plays Jasmine. She has learned every line and song and is right on the stage with her the whole time helping her perform. It is the best thing I've ever seen in my life.
 Her heart is so wide open to all kinds of people and it's a real lesson to me. 
 Her heart is especially wide open to all the college kids she worked with in Music Man. She sort of thinks she's already in college, which is equally terrifying and hilarious.
Thankfully, these happen to be the kind of college kids that I want influencing her life.
 They all took such good care of her on the set.
 And because I'm human and totally have favorites, I now take care of them.
 They can come to my house and eat all the food out of my fridge anytime they want.
 They can even live with me (one of my most favorite musical theater students is doing just that).

 Remind me to teach college students about the benefits of clear tape.
Even if she is destined to be poor for the rest of her life, I could not be more proud of the way she uses her talents.
She's pretty wonderful.

Thursday, March 2, 2017

A lot of normal things have happened the past four months

I've been avoiding this place lately because I got behind and every time I thought about catching up I got overwhelmed and wanted to go hide in a closet.

But, these are the only memories my kids are going to have because Lord knows I don't scrapbook, I haven't printed a picture since 2007, and I drink too much aspartame to be able to sufficiently remember anything. So, this is it.

My to-blog list:

  1. hiking the grand canyon - we didn't die
  2. Thanksgiving and Christmas - you know, gluttonous
  3. Bode's sports - he recently said he's having two children and naming them LeBron and Kyrie, so, basically, it's going great
  4. Mia's theater - she's been in Music Man, she's been to Sacramento, she's mentoring special needs kids, and just got cast as Jasmine in Aladdin (she just had to be the slutty princess)
  5. MARATHON IN DISNEY WORLD! Why, yes, this did need to be in all caps, thankyouverymuch
  6. Jen Hatmaker and I are besties and now I can die happy.
This biggest disappointment I've experienced in having older kids is that you can't make fun of them on the internet as much. They have A LOT of feelings. It's super annoying. 

And, children, when I make this into a book and present it to you at your high school graduation or some other super monumental event in your life, you better friggin' love it.